once in a while, there comes a song that describes perfectly the way one feels. welcome my latest theme song. it sums up perfectly my recent train of thought.

that hump.

i love school... i do. i love learning, and i love interacting with people. but it's killing me, slowly. the structure. the institutionalism. the bullshit work that has nothing to do with anything. it's clipping my wings. plucking each, one by one, until soon I won't be able to fly, let alone soar in my creativity. what to do, though? i need education. but i need my creativity more. i'm drained. more and more every day, i feel like an invalid. i've managed to hide away my creativeness... tuck it into some crevice, below some structure, away from the contagious monotony currently plaguing me. when i get a chance, when i'm certain it's safe-- usually in the wee hours of the night-- i uncover my creativity and jot a few things down, utilizing it. but only for short periods, as i can't chance it being overcome. i don't suspect i'll have the chance to be my usual creative self for awhile. at least until i find myself done with academia. until then... i don't know, honestly.


boredom leads to...

...shit like this.

floating stairs

i was browsing a friend's blog (antisociology) and came across this photo... and my gosh. how i need these in my life. who wouldn't want floating stairs in their house? jesus. architectural magic. visually stunning. oh how i crave. i crave. i need, i need. well, i want, and hope for the future.


how smart!

ever think to yourself [i need a clever place to store condoms]??
well think no more, the solution is here, and it's rather ingenious.
it's creative, and it's minimalist, which makes me all the more excited about it.
the condom case is from the "honey trap" series by MAVO's masayuki takahashi.



i've never been to spain, but i hope to visit once i'm nestled over in the uk. i want to really see it though, the gritty, raw, honest-to-god shit. not what they want me to see. because, well, i think there's beauty in reality. i came across this photo as i was doing a bit of browsing online, and wanted to post it. i think it's amazing and a good representation of the kind of scenery i wish to view.



how amazing are these? my birthday is in 9 days... if you want to buy me something, these are a good start. the white supra NS trinity. gosh. i haven't been excited about a sneaker since the launch of creative recreation... but these are just... wow.

"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."

this quote came to me recently. it's taken from the book the picture of dorian gray, by oscar wilde. i'm not certain what to think of it, as it definitely holds a level of truth, but at the same time, it goes against the values instilled in me as a child. it's alluring though, this quote, and it's something to cogitate.

i'm actually reminded of a conversation i had recently with a friend of mine, where we were discussing our views on substances, peer pressure: that sort of thing. and i was saying how i was never pressured into doing anything by my peers, but my own self, rather. the allure and temptation of what that substance had to offer. and by indulging just once, my curiosity faded and it became a one-time thing. so in a way, lord henry, who is the character in the story responsible for that quote, is correct in his assumption that by yielding to temptation, the temptation becomes no longer.

any thoughts?

the house that dreams built

Vacation home outside Melbourne, Australia, designed by McBride Charles Ryan called 'Klein Bottle.' How amazing is this piece of architecture? From the exterior to the interior, everything about this house is orgasmic.


so, i've come to accept the fact that i'm just not a 'relationship' kind of person. they just don't work for me, nor do they really appeal to me. i don't know. perhaps i'm destined to be alone, with no offspring, or perhaps an adopted one(?)... who knows. but sometimes it's just disheartening, really, as i can't help but think i've got a problem. i'm a freak-- an abnormality. but then i think... maybe it's how i was raised(?). i've never seen my mum in a relationship. come to think about it, i've never really seen any close family members in healthy relationships; in fact, the majority of my family is comprised of single folk. so perhaps i've got this complex hanging over my head where i think relationships are shit, and an unclassifiable, undeniable waste of time. which is just about accurate. am i wrong for that? do i need therapy? maybe. but then again, maybe not. although once in awhile i want to be nestled up next to a boo, i enjoy the freedom associated with not having to be boggled down by someone else's shit, or having to report back to someone every waking hour of the day (i do that enough with my mother, bleh). suffice it to say, i don't know if i'm even capable to pull off a long-term relationship. and i'm okay with that. i think.

odd couple.

the album is dope. if you want to check it out, [see comments].

oh i yearn...

for the day when i can sit in front of a tv and watch skins. london can't come soon enough. *sigh. until then, i'll have to watch on channel4.com, which is a daunting task, as my comp is shit lately. bleh.


l'ennui musical

i was having an interesting conversation with a friend today. about music. it seems, at least to he and i, that music is in a state of boredom right now. there is nothing that seems to pop. nothing tickles the fancy; nothing is orgasmic-- at least with regard to mainstream music. i listen to many different genres, and love them all equally, but realistically speaking, there's only so much underground music i can listen to. i can only listen to so much 'deepness' before i fly off the deep end. i need that mainstream magic to balance things out. but it seems as tho there's nothing out at the moment that really gets me off. oh i long for the day when something as exciting as beyonce's 2003 smash 'crazy in love' drops. it'll pull me out of this musical funk. i seem to be losing myself in downtempo and ambient, soul and blues. i need something smashing to level the playing field. my rambling probably makes no sense to some, which is okay. someone will get what i am trying to say.


in the moment

He sat, slouched at his desk, staring vacantly at the blank page on his monitor. The cursor blinked repetitiously, making a mockery of his inability to perform. Overwhelmed, he allowed his body to swivel along with the chair, desperately hoping that a surge of momentum would come from the free-flowing movement. Nothing. The room was dark and still; the unvarying murmur of a space heater combined with the steady hum of the computer placed him in a trance, which he embraced. It took him briefly away from the task at hand, a daunting job for which he had no plan of execution. Twenty-four years and he didn’t know what to write. Where would he begin? All he needed was one sentence, something that would jump-start his creativity. One word, even. But it wouldn’t come, so he sat, swiveling.


i've smelled heaven.

so my mom and i went to bloomingdales the other day: she had to return a coat. at any rate, we came in through the entrance where the first thing you hit is the fragrance counter. after pushing through the saleswomen bombarding us with samples, and politely taking a few (i was the polite one... my mom kept walking), we did what we came to do. however, while conducting the transaction, i pulled some of the samples from my pocket and we proceeded to smell them. the first was 'daisy' by marc jacobs, which was amazing. it was so fresh and invigorating. suffice to say, this got my mother happy, and she basically fought her way back to the perfume. when we got there, i noticed two perfumes standing alone: the new fendi, and the new pucci. cutting to the chase, the pucci (called pucci vivara) was AMAZING. it was heaven. it's an amazing floral fragrance reminiscent of the italian riviera. it has subtle hints of almond amaretto, and gives off a fresh mediterranean vibe. so for you reading this, if you're a woman and a fan of perfume, go smell it; you'll be immersed in how delectable it is! so anyway, my mom buys it, and the saleswoman remembered my having taken the sample from her... so she gives me a few samples as a thank you for basically handing her a sale. among the samples she gave was the AMAZING new (and FIRST EVER) men's fragrance by prada. i'm a big fan of cologne, but i'm extremely selective. there are lots of colognes that smell good, but i hate that many of them are extremely popular, and when you go somewhere, people are able to name what you're wearing. anyway, from the moment i smelled the prada, i was hooked. it was just my style: mysterious, fresh, light and airy-- ethereal yet masculine. and the fact that it's brand new (meaning not yet popular) i had to jump on it. and it's my latest obsession. for the guys reading this, please don't copy. stick to your issey miyake, cool water, and curve, please.



as some of you know, i'm into public relations. which really doesn't have anything to do with this post, other than being a cool segue into the fact that i enjoy good advertisements, and love to rip apart the bad ones. at any rate, one commercial advertisement in particular i've come to enjoy these days is the new campaign for the oreo brand of cookie. every time i see this ad on television, i smile. it just does my heart good to see father/son bonding. and it really is clever the way the commercial was put together. if you haven't seen it, check it out below:


the last time...

so my last time in london, i was so domesticated and inebriated, i saw absolutely nothing. well, that's not true. from my friend's car, at about 90mph, i saw the london eye, parliament, and big ben (which is the picture to the left, taken from my friend's car). so, really, what i saw was a frenzied shadow of these monuments as i whizzed on by. oh, and i saw the london bridge as i rode the train, and heard "please mind the gap" every two minutes as i rode the tube (after the 4th time hearing it, i wanted to cut off my ears). i plan to actually see something next time i'm there, which will actually come soon. at the end of august, i'll be making the trek to the other side of the pond to study for a few months, which i'm extremely excited about. it's one thing to be there partying for a week, but it's another thing completely to live there for months on end. there's no telling what will happen; that's actually what is exciting. one thing's for sure: i will see some sights, damn it. i want to walk around and see everything, like a cheesy tourist: i think i've the right to do that. eventually, though, i'll get sick of it and blend in like i did last time, partying and living amongst the brits. oooh, and i'll have one of my best friends with me (getting a master's and hopefully finding love aka citizenship), which is amazing! we'll be getting into lots of debauchery, and drinking tons of wine. wow. i'm excited just thinking about it... it's on. oh, and secretly, i plan to immerse myself in the culture so much, i come back to america with an accent. i've always wanted one.

journey through the chakras

so anyone who knows me should know that i'm not into religion as i am spirituality, and i really love yoga. not too long ago, i took a series of classes that encompassed many different branches of the practice, from hatha yoga to tibetan yoga, to partner yoga, to kripalu yoga, to yoga nidra. what stood out to me, though, was the journey we took through the chakras (energy systems throughout the body that govern life force energy). i won't get into the details right now, as it can be a daunting task (not necessarily for me, but for you, the reader) to understand. just know that there are a number of chakras throughout the body, each composite of a different type of energy. they each have different characteristics, and produce a certain type of energy when tapped into. all of this to segue into my having recently purchased a dvd of kundalini yoga, which delves heavily into the chakras. i practiced for the first time today, and i must say, it was a challenge: i wasn't able to finish the whole dvd. suffice to say, as challenging as some of the poses are, it was a great workout, and it left me with an incredible amount energy, both physical and spiritual, which is why i'm here talking about it. so if there is anyone reading who is into yoga but hasn't tried kundalini, or perhaps someone that is curious as to what yoga can bring to your life, i'd say go out and experience it. it'll definitely do you a world of good.


burberry prorsum's fall 2008 rtw = amazing. it's organic, yet incredibly stylish, which kind of describes me to a tee. i feel like i should be draped in duds like these for the upcoming fall/winter season, especially since i'll be living in europe for a bit. however, i'm unbearably broke right now, so i'm going to have to find a way to make it happen. i'm pretty sure my clothes won't be burberry prorsum, but they'll definitely have the chic and organic elements embodied in the collection. and who knows... maybe i'll find the funds to incorporate a piece or two.

here are a few of my favourites from the line:

[photos taken from NYmag.com]

Yoshimoto Nara

dope japanese pop artist who depicts innocent looking childlike figures with ironic dispositions/ or intensity gleaming from their eyes. he's become massive in japan... major in the west. i'm digging his work. he's got some vision. i love his use of muted colors, and his vintage style. and i love, too, the irony in his work. so smart! now i wouldn't pay what he's charging... but the art is definitely fun to look at. check out the brief video regarding he and his work below.


currently reading...

i really don't know why i decided to read this book. perhaps in the back of my mind, i felt that it is a book i should have already tackled. upon talking to my peers, i discovered that most have read it-- one of my friends actually had to read it in high school. it is a piece of literature that coincides with my heritage, and frankly, i felt rather disturbed about not having read it. a part of me felt as if i was lacking, or better yet slacking, so i went to amazon.com and purchased it. i must say, it is an interesting journey thus far. as i was reading last night, i found myself unable to put the novel down: it definitely has a way of grabbing your attention. it's blunt and bold, and i can see why it garnered as much attention as it has through the years. i look forward to finishing it.

l'avenue a paris

i came across this street whilst roaming alone around paris. it was tucked away to the left of the champs elysees, and i found it inspiring, hence the photo. i think about this street often, as it was beautiful to me, in all of its rustic simplicity. i wonder what goes on there, who the inhabitants are: what takes place behind each wall. the stories must be endless. one thing's for sure: i yearn to see it again. and to see even more like it. more beautiful. more inspiring. europe is calling me. i shall answer soon.


every so often, an artist comes out with a work that you just have to have, at any cost. you know it's gonna be dope. and once you get it, it doesn't disappoint. erykah badu's latest effort, nu amerykah, pt. 1 is just that. it's a paradigm: crack music at its best. it's music that scoops you up, holds you in its grasp, and turns you out. i must say, ms. badu did her thing on this one. it's a blend of funk, hip hop and soul. it's sassy yet serious, autobiographical (as well as biographical) and an anomaly with regard to what's current in music. artistic expression at its best here (i'm not posting a link to download, but a link to watch her perform 'ME' & the video for honey is below).

erykah badu - ME (live)


amazing. orgasmic. seamless. clean. chic. these are all words to describe the paragon that is minimalism. it's all artful. the art itself, to clothing, to actual space decor. oh, how i can't wait to be settled into my profession, so i can indulge in this prototypical form of design.

(modern bathroom design: fontana & fonte by ceramica flaminia)

(luxurious bathroom collection from carmenta)

(modern wall unit design by hartmann)

(modern sofa design by de sede)

supermodels du jour

don't ask me why, but lately i've been obsessed with a select group of girls who grace the pages of fashion magazines and sashay down notable runways all over the world. there's something unique about each of them, something that draws me in and makes me want to know more. the allure, the mystery surrounding them is uncanny. perhaps it's the fact that they look good both on and off the runway. they've got style...tres chic, they are. il y a trois que je t'aime a l'instant: agyness deyn, freja beha, & irina lazareanu, seen above. there are other notables, such as jessica stam, chanel iman, gemma ward, and lily cole, but these 3 give off a vibe i dig-- perhaps it's the bad girl vibe. whatever the case, they're dope.

freja beha 1 freja beha 2 agyness deyn 1 agyness deyn 2 irina lazareanu

animal magic

one of my favorite electronic, downtempo bands: bonobo. what amazing vision they have. it's evident in their music. in 2001 they came out with this album, animal magic. it's raw and melodic with some dark spots, yet clean and minimal. check it out below. it'll entrap you.

(click to dl)

my need.

i need to see him. i need to be him... to feel his presence as to encapsulate him. he doesn't exist, simply in my mind. he is but a figment of my imagination, a puppet for me to contort and control. my need, though, is to lose that control. to splatter his thoughts, his feelings, his wants, his desires, onto paper. to be one with him. but it is a challenge to submit to his will when the need for self is so strong at this moment in time. but i've put him on hold for so long, i'm afraid if i do it again, he will leave me, and i'll never be able to tell his story. and my work will never be complete. slow and steady perhaps. losing myself a bit each day, but reeling myself back in as to not lose myself completely. it's what i'm going to have to do.

got 'till it's gone

in 1997, janet came out with the joni mitchell-sampled 'got 'till it's gone.' it is still one of my favorite songs, as it has much resonance with regard to my own life. i've recently come to understand and appreciate the video, which took place in south africa, depicting south african apartheid. the video can be seen below.